Advice: “I know I need to heal from my childhood trauma, but I don’t even know where to start. What’s the first step?”
First of all, you are very brave for even asking for help. Second, you are very self-aware for recognizing that you need healing.
There are many routes you can take when it comes to healing childhood trauma.
- Getting professional help from a therapist
- Working through it alone
- Doing both
Now, having a therapist is wonderful for someone who has a limited understanding of what the trauma truly is or is having a hard time expressing those things. I know many people who have had great success with this.
If you are more self-aware, you may not find a therapist useful. In this case, you may be able to deep dive into your own trauma and heal it straight from the root. I have done this and helped many loved ones do this as well. I will give you a few tips to get you started quickly. I will warn you that it will not be easy, and it will be painful at times. So be sensitive and patient with yourself.
- Start writing down your first memories. Do your best not to leave out any details, including how you were feeling at that time. We need to figure out the root of the issues.
- Be honest about your triggers. What triggers you? Is it a word, a person, a song? It could be anything that takes you back to that specific trauma.
- Write a letter to your younger self or inner child. It can be as long as you need it to be. This letter should tell your younger self or inner child that they didn’t deserve what they experienced. Also, be sure to let them know that they are overcoming the past and healing so that the child in you can be free.
- Determine what habits/addictions you may have picked up. You may be using them as a way to cover up your trauma. Be very honest about this. There is no shame in how you decided to handle things.
- Be mindful of the boundaries that were being crossed at that time. What were they? How were they being crossed? Are they still an issue now?
- Make a list of people you need to forgive. Forgiving is probably the most important part of this. But that does not mean you need to forget or allow those same people back into your life. They are simply the people who caused you harm, triggered you, or upset you in any way.
Once you are complete with these tasks, you can move on to more difficult activities if necessary. Just let me know, and I can send some over to you or make another post.
Like I said, it will be painful, and it is not a quick fix. This is something that will help you start unpacking your trauma. At the end of the day, be kind and loving to yourself during this process and after.
If you need any more help with this, let me know. I am all ears!
Disclaimer: I am not a licensed therapist. I do have a degree in Social and Behavioral Studies, as well as certificates in Basic Care and Counseling, Pastoral Counseling, and Marriage and Family Counseling. I believe my education and personal experiences have helped me understand the needs of someone in this situation.