How I Deal With Fibromyalgia, Anxiety and Depression
In our society, depression and anxiety are a part of millions of lives. It’s a mental and physical problem that doesn’t just go away in a flash. For me, I’ve been dealing with it for my whole life. Well, at least it feels that way. You never truly know the exact dates or times of when it began, but you just know that it did. As a kid, I would say that I felt depressed and the typical parent response is “you have nothing to be depressed about” or “you don’t even know what that is”. I was a lot smarter than the average child, and I knew for a FACT that this was something serious. As I got older, I suppressed these feelings and emotions. It got harder and harder to think, feel, and to even live. But, in my household, you had nothing to be depressed about! So, things get brushed over once again.
Anxiety became something that was unexpected. An anxiety attack, pain, stress, and feeling out of control emotionally all came in one big moment. This seemed to be a lot more real and scarier for those who denied my depression. I guess it was because they could see what I felt inside. It was a relief and a new nightmare to deal with all in one. Medication helps, but only to make you sleep, and talking about it goes nowhere when the other person doesn’t understand or won’t bring themselves to. It leaves you in a state of fear. You are lost, confused, and frankly more depressed than ever before.
During all of this, I became a mom and let me tell you that the postpartum depression was terrible. The anxiety along with that was the hardest time in my life. You want to be the best mom, but you can’t because of all the feelings and thoughts going on in your brain and body. As a mom, you do a lot of faking and hiding behind a smile to ensure that your child never sees the worst parts of you. I think I did as best as I could, and thankfully, I have a great family who helped me.
Over the years, I still had anxiety and depression here and there. It was not such a bother because I became so used to ignoring it. I kept telling myself that maybe its all in my head. Maybe my family was right there is nothing to be depressed about. One thing I couldn’t ignore was the constant pain I felt all over my body!
Fast forward to the end of 2017. My pain, stress, and anxiety were through the roof! I couldn’t control it. I felt so weak. I began having anxiety attacks and then not being able to even function for hours at a time. In one day I had 3 anxiety attacks and had to be taken into the Emergency Room. After being ordered to relax in my bed for a few days, the pain became unbearable. The depression got deep and the emotions were VERY HIGH. I went to see a new doctor for the follow-up appointment and I was finally diagnosed with depression and anxiety. It felt good to hear that I was not just complaining and that what I felt and what I knew was true. But, the downside to all of this was the fact that the depression and anxiety came in a package deal with fibromyalgia. I was not looking forward to that. It explained the constant pain, and all of the others symptoms I felt over the years. I felt freed knowing there was a reason, but now the new journey begins with finding a solution.
There are still many days that I struggle with these feelings and emotions. Most times, I am doing this alone. Sure, there are family and friends, but 99% of the time, they can not relate to what you are going through. Some of them don’t even want to understand what you may be going through. That is why I rely on God. I rely on his presence to get me through all of the problems that I deal with every single day. Praying and focusing my mind on the positive things has helped me a whole lot, and I believe that It will help me better than any medication can. But, I know this is not the case for everyone. Always try new things and remedies that can relieve the pain you feel mentally, physically, and emotionally. There are plenty of doctors who will work hard to help you, there are a bunch of stores that have the best natural products, and don’t be afraid to make your own!
I love the products at Sprouts. It’s a grocery store that has every homeopathic and natural vitamin and medicine you can think of! I use the Hylands brand products for pain relief, relaxation, and sleep aid. There is also a great product called Arnica that helps with pain as well. Another method you can use is through foods. Walnuts are an awesome help for depression. I will eat about a 1/2 a cup of walnut halves in the morning and they help me stay clear mentally throughout the day. Staying on top of your Vitamin D, Calcium, and Magnesium is EXTREMELY important in this case!
I am thankful that I can share this through my blog. It is a form of therapy for me and really helps clear my mind and my heart. I hope that this can reach someone else and give them hope and hopefully a friend! I would love to post more about general health and mental health. Leave me suggestions and idea for what to write about next!
Have you dealt with fibromyalgia, depression, and anxiety? How do you get through this?